


Tainted

by ethereal_blue



Series: Sleeping with a Friend [1]
Category: New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt, F/M, I APOLOGIZE, M/M, i need to repent, i probably shouldn't do this, someone make a happy ending of this, this was a sin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-17
Updated: 2018-01-17
Packaged: 2019-03-06 01:54:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,650
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13400985
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ethereal_blue/pseuds/ethereal_blue
Summary: Shuichi forgets his self-worth because of a few misunderstandings.





	Tainted

**Author's Note:**

> Is this angst? I don’t know if this is angst. Well it hurt me writing it so I guess this is angst for _me_ not Shuichi.  
>  God I really had a hard time writing this. Not because I put in some detail, (I can make much more raunchier things than this) no. It just makes me feel so sad to see Shuichi in pain. **NEVER** make my beloved Shuichi despair you hear me! 
> 
> Also just a one shot because I need a lot of time before making my darling detective feel like this again and I just made this cause i was bored at the office. Seriously I hate making Shuichi cry even if it’s only through stories. His canon tears made me die inside, fanfiction tears just make me want to crawl into a hole and absorb all his sadness. Anyways enjoy some sort of despair if this is what you’re into ~~not judging but side-eyes heavily since Shuichi is meant to be loved!~~. How in the world did this story get up to 12 pages on word!? 
> 
> notes at the end are just rambling so yeah you can skip that at the end

He clutched the sheets tightly against his naked body, afraid that if he let it slip away his remaining sanity would go with it. Pretending to sleep, staying ever so still, he watched another shadowy silhouette exit his room, not once did it glance back. He didn’t remember who it was anymore, not even the gender. All he knew was someone had their way with him, something he willingly consented to, and left just like that.

How many days has it been since he last slept alone? Might have been a long, long time ago, since someone was always beside him in his bed at night and by the next morning they were gone, leaving Shuichi to feel used and abandoned.

 It was routine at this point.

Shuichi had been letting his classmates have sex with him when they wanted, offering himself up and fulfilling their fantasies at the expense of his own values.

Tears dropped from his eyes, hiding behind the sheet he deemed unclean. Not that it mattered anymore, he wasn’t pure. Far from it. He was as tainted as Monokuma and still he considered himself viler than the being that wanted them to kill each other. At least that teddy bear had a portion of himself which could be considered pure.

Shuichi had no one to blame except himself for this happening.

He shouldn’t have let it get that far. He shouldn’t have proposed this in the first place.

But he did.

He told them they could use him for their sexual needs not outright or expressly, but he invites them into his room and everyone knows he wasn’t planning on just talking. Not because he needed an outlet himself. No. He did it because he felt that that was the only way they would need him. That they would remember that Shuichi Saihara exists.

He was a detective. Someone proficient in the language of crimes. But they all agreed not to kill each other, so there was no crime to solve. No body to investigate. Nothing.

Just a pissed off Monokuma who just let them do as they please while they were locked up, eyes determined to get someone to die but doing nothing nonetheless.

Shuichi tried to get up, going for a glass of water in the little fridge their rooms had when he felt something wet and slimy run down his thighs. _Probably from one of his classmates_ , he thought, taking note that his partner for the night was one of the boys.

As if instantly, he felt sore from the waist down and collapsed under his own weight, seeing much more clearly what had been travelling down his legs just seconds ago. Shuichi reached out to the tissues by his bedside and cleaned it up, not wanting to look at it any longer.

He was disgusting. Disgusting for tainting his classmates and for not valuing himself more.

He ran a tissue up his leg, making sure to get every bit of semen stuck on his skin. He was revolted at himself but remembered how he screamed for the other when they were inside him. He reminded himself as always, he wanted this, he deserved this. This was all he was good for.

It never changed. His nightly routine.

He would bond with them in the morning like they were normal. That he wasn’t some nymphomaniac orgasming to a new person each night, begging to fuck harder or be fucked. Depending on who he was with that night, he changes personas. From a domineering top, to a submissive bottom and even a soft-spoken lover if they wished. He goes with whatever the other wanted, burying his self in an abundance of lies. He’ll wake up with the sounds of shuffling and getting clothed and when the door closed, regret was the only thing that remained.

There wasn’t any afterglow to bask in. No good morning kisses or lazily cuddling till lunch.

They got what they wanted so they left him. Alone and cast-off.  

Even though Shuichi would prefer otherwise.

He had tried of course, he tried to keep at least one person and not this sad excuse for a human being.

When he first slept with Kokichi he thought that was the only time he was going to do this. To be _sleeping with a friend._ The small boy was the first one he offered himself to, probably acting on his feelings rather than his rational side. Just seeing Kokichi alone at the courtyard made him do it.

He was the one who pulled Kokichi into his room. He was the one who initiated the kiss. And he was the one who let their bodies topple down on his bed.

Kokichi was slow and sweet with him, actually making it feel like he was worth making love to. He was gentle and kind that Shuichi felt that the tiny feelings he had for the boy exploded all at once. He loved the way he kissed him, making sure every nook and cranny of his body had passed through his lips.

How he traced his fingers on Shuichi’s body as if drawing a piece of art.

How Kokichi softly whispered words that expressed how wonderful and beautiful he was as he let his body tremble.

“Shuichi…I love you…” he whispered before gently caressing the detective’s face, eyes full of adoration.

Kokichi seemed to have been the perfect partner for a first time that it made him feel magical. Shuichi even thought that if Kokichi was going to stay by his side, then maybe he was going to be his reason not to disappear in the background. To be someone worthy.

They fell asleep in the room of the detective, their limbs tangling with each other, and Shuichi enjoyed having Kokichi beside him.

He was wrong though. Unlike his prowess in crime solving, he was utterly hopeless in love.

“Kokichi, where are you going?” he was still hazy from euphoria that the small boy had given him. Shuichi rubbed the sleep off his eyes and settled on looking at the boy sitting at the edge of his bed. He was already clothed and was just putting on his shoes.

“Out, duh Shuichi. Our one-night stand ended the moment you came.” He said sarcastically, as if it was obvious from the start. His back was turned so Shuichi wasn’t sure if he was lying. His voice certainly didn’t give anything away.

Kokichi checked to see if he put on his clothes right before heading to the door. “You were kind of boring, being a virgin and all, but still a nice lay. Now I’m going before you get attached to me.”

“But…Kokichi…” Shuichi was lost. He thought Kokichi felt something for him, like how he did for the boy. Shuichi wouldn’t have let him do whatever he wanted if he was just planning on fucking, no strings attached.

Kokichi didn’t say another word before closing the door behind him.

It wouldn’t have hurt him if it was all that. It was okay to think that Kokichi just wanted a fuck buddy and not an actual relationship.

But Kokichi acted like nothing happened between them, that he was not worth remembering and easily forgettable. Kokichi made him feel that every emotion he gave him that night was a lie and Shuichi couldn’t handle that.

It pierced through him to see the boy joke with him, acting like everything was fine. Like that moment never happened. Like he didn’t leave Shuichi wanting, wondering what could have been if Kokichi returned what he felt.

The moment that Shuichi wanted to treasure with all his being was being swept away under the rug just like that. It managed to put a dent in his heart. 

Looking back, his encounter with Kokichi spiraled him into this hell. If he didn’t run away maybe he wouldn’t have tried again. If only he just remembered how they both felt great and satisfied then maybe he would have stopped and saved himself from any further heartache.

No. Life wasn’t kind like that.

Rantaro was his second encounter. He didn’t seem to notice at first, but as time went on, Rantaro had the same eyes he thought Kokichi had for him. Those eyes that saw him as something more than a detective.

He wanted to know if Rantaro was the one.

So, in the same fashion, he invited the other to his room. Unlike Kokichi, Rantaro did not jump at him immediately. He was actually carefully treading the territory as if he was afraid to break anything that they had already established. This made Shuichi hope. Hope that Rantaro was who he was looking for.

Rantaro despite appearances, was clumsier compared to Kokichi. He fumbled taking off Shuichi’s clothes as well as his own. His kisses were chaste before becoming hungry of want, turning into a sloppy make out session rather than the vanilla kiss session he had with Kokichi a few days ago.

He would always ask how Shuichi felt, if it was alright to bite him and give him love marks.

If he was being too rough or too slow.

If he wasn’t regretting doing it with him.

Rantaro asked Shuichi his thoughts and in its own way it was arousing. Knowing that his opinion actually mattered outside a courtroom made Shuichi feel warm inside.

“Are you sure you want to do this with me, Shuichi?” Rantaro asked once more, holding Shuichi’s legs open as if letting the boy open him up like this meant that he was going to back out now. Shuichi was needy at this point that he didn’t give him a reply and just wrapped his legs onto Rantaro, pulling himself up to kiss the boy.

Rantaro took it as an okay before fully entering Shuichi.

In this encounter he was more responsive, wanting to make the other feel as good as he did. By the time they finished, they were a mess, heavy breathing was all he could do before Rantaro gave him one last kiss. Shuichi closed his eyes and dreamt of spending the rest of his days with Rantaro in the academy they were locked in.

When morning came, Shuichi woke up alone, the used condom on the floor and Rantaro’s necklace were the only signs that it really happened.

He didn’t think wrongly of it. Maybe he was in a hurry and needed a change of his clothes. He was quite open to that possibility.

But Rantaro was the same as he always was. He didn’t even blush when Shuichi returned the necklace and subtly told him he loved him. Unlike the night before, where saying the green-haired boy’s name made him turn as red as a tomato, this time that small declaration only gained him a soft chuckle and a playful nudge, treated as a joke by the boy he gave his damaged heart to.

This had him depressed, a bit more broken, but he was still hopeful.

So, when he saw Kaede give him interest, he wanted to try again.

It was his first time with the opposite gender and it felt weird. Both times he had sex he was on the receiving end, letting the two boys handle him. Now he was pressured to take the lead since he knew far too well that Kaede wasn’t going to.

He opted to be gentle, like a loving boyfriend that Kaede always said he was if he ever got into a relationship. This time, he was going to work hard to fulfill their ideal him. Shuichi spent a long time on foreplay, pleasuring the blonde before attending to his own needs. Maybe this was why they went wrong.

He was selfish during those times. He didn’t think of the other. Maybe Kokichi and Rantaro thought he was needy and high-maintenance.

Shuichi was trying his best to give Kaede the best time of her life.

“Shuichi…” she panted through her pleasure induced haze. Her eyes had been half-open the entire time, giving Shuichi the confidence that maybe he was doing a great job. That maybe Kaede was going to stay.

“Please, hurry up. I want…” Kaede didn’t finish whatever she wanted to say because Shuichi did what she wanted her to. He kissed her as he thrusted, making the girl moan louder, his mouth cutting off any sound that might escape and wake the others.

Not that it mattered, their rooms were sound proof.

Shuichi was determined to have Kaede by his side in the morning but like the time with Kokichi he was woken up in the middle of the night, Kaede already dressed and ready to go.

He didn’t repeat his mistake with Kokichi. He reached out to grab the pianist’s hand and held it tightly. “Kaede…” _Stay._

“Huh? What is it Shuichi?” she wondered, actually stopping a minute to listen to the other and he hoped that it meant she wasn’t going anywhere.

“Please, don’t go.” Shuichi begged, his voice betraying himself. He didn’t want to sound weak, Kaede didn’t like it when he was weak. Shuichi feared that it might add to her reasons of going if he was still that weak detective she first met.

“I’m just going back to my room Shuichi. I won’t go anywhere.” Kaede’s smile was so sweet, the smile he was used to getting. “It’s just, if people saw me going out of your room in the morning, I think some nasty gossip might circulate about you. I don’t want that.”

Shuichi wanted to believe her words. At the time he really did. Kaede was always sincere and genuine with him.

Kaede was someone he could always trust.

But that was Kaede’s lie.

He let go and watched as the pianist waved goodbye by the door, the light from the outside slowly fading, taking with it his last hope of getting out of this situation.

Shuichi had finished wiping off and threw all the used tissues in his trash bin. He was glad Monokuma didn’t ask why he always had a lot of tissues in his bin, or he just didn’t really care. He knew Monokuma was lying when he said he respected their privacy. He had seen how the bear laughs in his face whenever his friends continued their _Shuichi is only good for sex and nothing else_ schtick that he just lets it be.

If Monokuma was recording all the sex he had gotten, then he didn’t care. Hell, if he wanted to sell it to some lowly scum bag who gets off seeing students get it with each other then go ahead. Shuichi had personally stopped caring. Everything he thought was dear actually meant nothing to the others so why should he salvage any remains of his dignity.  

Shuichi entered his shower room, letting hot water fall on top of his head to the rest of his body. Water cascaded down, running over some of bruises he earned from his classmate. They felt sore, making him wince a little with each bad move he made. But they were proof. Proof that he was at one point, loved and needed.

Turning off the water he inspected the proof of his classmates’ care.

Some had turned purple, like the ones on his thighs as well as his wrist. They were the fairly new ones. He remembers he got them from Kiyo at Monday, after Shuichi promised he was going to show him something he was working on.

Kiyo didn’t expect anything at all, that was why he was unusually rough with him when he saw Shuichi was already tied with his favorite rope, getting aroused by just the sight.

Getting the rope to be tied that tight was a challenge to do alone but he did it. He persevered in getting it done and Shuichi’s reward was sex with Kiyo that felt more wild than usual. Just like he wanted.

He was used to being tied up by Kiyo, that was what most of their sex was. Bondage with a slice of S&M sometimes. The pain wasn’t the problem when he was doing it with Kiyo.

At first it was, but Shuichi hated something more than pain whenever they had sex.

It wouldn’t matter to Shuichi if he was just a sadistic asshole that treated him like an object, in fact he would appreciate it more if Kiyo was that…but Kiyo wasn’t. He wasn’t some psycho that didn’t care about Shuichi.

He actually paid attention if he went too far, softly rubbing the bruise that forms when he accidentally pulls a little too hard.

Kiyo cuddles Shuichi when they finish, letting him get enveloped in his warmth as he feels Kiyo’s hot breath against his ear.

He lets him breathe when he sees he needed air from over stimulation and kisses him when Shuichi wants him to.

He acted like they were lovers and that was worse than being treated as a sex toy. Because after everything that happened, the pain and the pleasure, it made him hope that Kiyo was really that. A lover to someone who was used time and time again, loved at night but disregarded in the morning.

Shuichi got out of the shower, draping the bathrobe they were supplied with around his body. He stood before the mirror and reached out to get the concealer. He asked Monokuma for it, which the bear gave him a whole box worth. This further proved his theory that the bear was aware of what happens in his room.

Shuichi carefully applied the concealer on his bruises and hickeys. As much as he loved looking at his so-called validation of existence, he didn’t want to meet the questioning looks of his fuck buddies. They act like they were worried about the bruises but they never remembered that those bruises came from them.

Like that one time where they went swimming and Miu asked about or more like mocked the scratches that traced down on his back, completely forgetting she was the one who marked him while biting down her screams. She loved it when Shuichi had been rough and sadistic. Making her get close to climaxing before putting a full stop for it, soliciting a whimper from the inventor. What he did was cruel, he thinks of it often, being denied release, but Miu loved it. She loved being dominated and it was what she always looked for in him. He even puts his mark on the inventor, such as holding way too tight on her thighs and even leaving a hickey on her neck. Miu was the first one he left those marks on and it felt gratifying.

Shuichi thought that if they saw those marks, they would remember how they were pleasured by the detective the night before. He hoped again that those marks would let someone, anyone remember that they loved how Shuichi complemented their body and how he was.

And again, it was wishful thinking.

Those marks were hidden from view by the others, or if they weren’t they were unsure where they got it. Not knowing the culprit was right beside them, they continued with the disregard everything Shuichi made me feel bit and that was the final nail on the coffin.

Shuichi wasn’t going to bother meaning anything to them more than a one night stand.

He finished applying the concealer and turned to look if everything was covered up with make-up.

He stepped out of the room and went to his closet filled with identical uniforms, other pieces of clothing added at the back. These were what Tsumugi let him wear during their times with each other. She was a fan of roleplaying and even wanted the other to look the part.

Shuichi complies of course, he was a good sex partner after all. Tsumugi was the one who needed the most research since she likes to change their dynamics a lot, depending entirely on who he was roleplaying.

One thing consistent with their nights together was when Tsumugi was close, he slows down his pace, taking away the cosplayer’s glasses and putting it on himself before finishing it up with a kiss. Tsumugi wasn’t a fan of cuddling and Shuichi didn’t pry further, only letting the other sleep as he places those glasses back onto the cosplayer.

Shuichi settled on his detective uniform. He liked the way it fit his body.

He attempted to smile at his reflection in the mirror. Surprisingly he managed to do it. A smile he couldn’t form these past few moments had suddenly appeared on his face. _Maybe today was going to be a good day._

Shuichi liked the way he looked at the mirror. No scars blemishing his skin, no tears forming in his eyes and a smile that told him it was going to be okay. Yes. This Shuichi that was looking back was happy.

And that was all he needed to convince himself to go out. He went to the table and picked up his monopad, his fingers brushing past the fabric of his trusty hat.

Did he need his hat today? He felt exposed without that hat, it had been his safe haven for many years after all. They might look at him weirdly if he didn’t have it on. He sighed, this was stupid.

“Would it really matter now? I’ve already been bare and naked in front of their eyes.” He giggled as if it was a joke only he would get. “Not like they give a damn. Whatever…”

Shuichi left the room, with nothing in hand except for his monopad, not bothering to lock his door. The halls were empty since it was just before the morning announcement, and felt another smile forming. This was better than he expected. He really needed some alone time.

Shuichi went out of the dormitory, the cold morning air made him shiver but he could manage. He was just going into the main building soon.

He passed by Monokuma on the way to the stairs, who only greeted him with his signature laugh. This time around, Shuichi didn’t just ignore the homicidal bear.

Shuichi gave him a smile and laughed with the bear, patting its head in a loving manner before heading to the fourth floor, towards his ultimate lab.

_Better enjoy my free time alone…_

* * *

 

They weren’t fully awake when Monokuma’s voice boomed through the monitors, demanding they meet him at the gym. It was more shrill and excited than normal but they didn’t want to let the bear take control any more of their lives. Surely it was more of his nonsense that they could ignore it for now.

No one was going to kill anyone so there was no threat of it being a body discovery announcement.

“Puhuhuhu. I wouldn’t ignore me if I were you. You might regret not coming down here. Puhuhuhu.”

The bear’s laughter was obviously mocking and in a way challenging the ultimates to take him seriously. Anger, confusion and general tiredness bubbled in each ultimate. Regrettably, they stood up, cursing Monokuma with all their beings.

“You need to be here in let’s say 5 minutes or so. Gotta hurry up, the clock’s ticking.” With his declaration the monitors went off and the academy was once more met with silence.

Amazingly, all of them managed to gather before Monokuma’s five minutes were up. This was the fastest time they assembled, almost all of them present. There was only one person missing from the line up…

“Hey, where’s Shuichi?” Maki asked to no one in particular. True enough, everyone was there sans the detective. Did he not hear the announcement? That couldn’t be. He was an early riser, he wakes up at the same time as Kirumi.

“Puhuhu, oh don’t worry. Shuichi is exempted from today’s assembly. He has another role to play.”

They didn’t get why the laughter that followed the bear was colder than usual. Like it was hiding something from them.

“Anyways, thanks for coming down here. I’ll get to the point. We’ll be playing a game…”

“We won’t be playing the killing game Monokuma.” Amami declared, the other ultimates agreeing in hums and grunts. Hadn’t he given up after the first two months where no killing happened? They were honoring their promise on no murder and it was going splendidly. This was their fifth month stuck in this hell hole and they were doing better than expected.

 

“Oh no no no no. The killing game got boring since you guys didn’t want to play so we won’t be playing that dated game. Insteadddd….”

The black and white bear pulled out a flashback light. “We’ll be playing hide and seek!”

The ultimates groaned. Hide and seek? It was such a childish game. Even Kokichi was annoyed and he loved playing games. Well, if those games were played when he was fully awake and not battling himself to keep his eyes open.

“Now now. I’m sure you all will participate once I tell you who you need to find.”

He called out to the Monokubs, specifically Monophanie, Monokid, Monotaro and Monosuke. They came in with a large television on hand of their Exisals. The Exisals raised the television to let every ultimate see. Their attention was not fully invested in Monokuma’s game.

“Your target is him…”

The monitor opened with static before showing Shuichi Saihara, the ultimate detective. He was looking directly at them, like this was in a first-person point of view. Well, not exactly directly he was looking down, almost like staring at a child. The detective was hovering his hand above the person they were seeing this from, as if patting its head. The video feed paused.

“The game is Hide and Seek. Shuichi is obviously your target and he is obviously somewhere in the academy. Your job is to find him.” Monokuma snickered, putting his two paws up to his mouth.

“That’s easy! We can find Shuichi in no time!” Kaito declared, pumping his fist up to the air. The others agreed knowing that Kaito was right. -

“Puhuhuh, well, of course you need to find him alive.”

Cold sweat ran down their backs when they heard Monokuma. Alive? They need to find him alive? Why!?

“You fucking bear did you do something to Shuichi!?” Kokichi was the first one to break the silence, screaming profanities at the bears. If he wasn’t being held back by Gonta, he would have rushed to them and actually punch them.

“You said you won’t touch us students directly!” Kaede accused. She was angry, everyone was. How did Monokuma do this while they were all sleeping? When Shuichi was vulnerable.

“Ahh, Pops didn’t do shit to that poor boy.” Monosuke chimed in, his voice amplified by the Exisal.

“We follow the school rules you punks!” Monokid added.

“What the fuck are you talking about?” Kokichi sneered, visibly calmer than before. Monokuma just laughed.

“I didn’t do anything to Shuichi … you guys did.”

“what?”

Before anyone could argue Monokuma held up the flashback light and turned it on. Each ultimate held their head into their hands, memories rushing back, too much memories of nights they spent with the boy.

They remembered. They fucking remembered now.

 

How they held Shuichi at night and he held them. How he was so downtrodden whenever they left his room, not knowing why.

How they fucking acted like that night was not the best of their lives and how the life in Shuichi’s eyes had been fading each time.

Why!?

Why did they forget!?

“Well, are you guys down in playing our game now?” Monokuma asked, ultimately enjoying the despair each student displayed on their faces.

“I…I did something horrible to Shuichi.” Kokichi was crying, and these were not his crocodile tears. He couldn’t stop this at his will and he for sure didn’t start it on his own volition. “I…hurt him.”

Rantaro’s mind couldn’t take it all in. He was overjoyed by the fact that he had been having intimate meetings with a boy he was interested in, but he was also enraged on how he acted each time he left the boy at night. What was he thinking!? He would never do that if he was in the right mind.

He imagines himself waking up next to him, close enough to examine each wrinkle on his face and still find him beautiful.

He was not someone who just fucked and go.

“This is f-fa.”

“This ain’t fake. It all happened during the six months you guys had just been lazily sitting here not killing anyone.” Monokuma stated. "You all played the little detective like a fiddle. You guys are devious heartless twats with how much you caused him despair.." 

“Why did you take our memories!?” Kiyo asked, his voice seething with hate for the black and white bear. "If you didn't do that then.." Then Shuichi hadn't had to suffer. He didn't know if the others did the same things as him to Shuichi but he knows he wouldn't make him feel like he was just a way to relieve himself of stress.

The bear titled its head. “Hmm? Because it was interesting. Plus it was my plan b. Using you guys for it was quite easy though." 

“All of you had fun with him, and he let himself be at your mercy, hoping at least one of you remembered the nights you spend together. Every time you guys came out of his room, I waited just outside, activating this newly made _repress light_ to steal that special night with him.”

As Monokuma told his side, they remembered it as well. How they met Monokuma just outside, acting suspiciously before being blinded by a light and waking up in their room feeling empty.

“But I didn’t tamper with Shuichi. He was too smart to have this prototype affect him. AND, it had a better effect if he remembered all the shitty things you horny kids did.” Monokuma was joined by the Monokubs present in laughing. Their voices bouncing off the walls of the gymnasium.

“Poor Shuichi…getting his feelings played with by his idiot classmates.”

They couldn’t deny it. If that happened to them, having someone for the night entirely then being treated as though nothing happened the next day would break them. It pained Kaito to think his sidekick didn’t once get angry at them for physically not remembering and just smiling off in the distance.

"What’s your deal Monokuma?” Ryoma asked, since he was the most level headed of the group. He hated that he let himself be affected by a prototype machine.

Monokuma answered honestly. “If I couldn’t get you guys to kill each other, then how about another way. I only need someone to die. I don’t care how. I just want to see a body that’s not breathing. A perfect despair, so what do you think am I planning?”

The gears in Maki’s head turned and her face grew pale. “No.”

“oh ho, Miss Assassin gets it!” Monotaro commented, raising his Exisal's hands with his own, making them release the t.v. "Uh, oopsies." 

“Before you guys get more worked up, and before my fucking kids mess up more, I’m going to tell you guys the rest of the instructions. Got it.”

“Shuichi is somewhere in this academy and I know what he’s planning. He doesn’t know you guys remember so he’ll probably go through with it. Your task is to find him before he kicks the bucket. If you find him first then I’ll remove his despair, but if I win welllllllll … let’s say I’m satisfied if you guys are too late.”

None of the ultimates were near the stage when he finished talking. All rushing out of the gymnasium, not caring that they were previously enveloped in sleep.

They needed to get to him.

They needed to beg for forgiveness and let him know how much he really means.

They would sacrifice everything just to save him.

* * *

 

“Did you like that story Monodam?” Shuichi asked as the green Monokub sat on his lap, listening to what the detective said. They were enjoying a storybook he borrowed from the library and decided to spend some time in his lab.

Monodam wasn’t actually replying, just letting a few noises out but Shuichi understood him. He understood whatever Monodam wanted to tell him.

“Ahh, I see. You wanted a happier ending.” He chuckled and lifted the Monokub to face him. He knew Monokuma probably told his cub to keep an eye on him, and he was probably planning something but he enjoyed the company all the same. “I’m sorry I can’t read you another story, my circumstances won’t allow it.”

 “Ahh, I wasted enough time. I need to do what I came here for Monodam, excuse me.” Shuichi stood up, carefully placing Monodam back on his seat, the cub just watching silently as he neared the shelf filled with poisons.

He already decided on what to take. The fastest one that was also the one which hurt the most.

“A fitting end for someone like me.”

He turned to the robot, knowing he was the last one who would ever see him alive and breathing.

“Thank you for spending some time with me. If it isn’t bother can I ask a favor?”

Monodam replied. “What-is-it?”

Despite the robotic delivery, Shuichi felt that Monodam was somehow sincere. He was happy that someone here still cared, even to just this extent. 

 

_**“Please don’t forget me.”** _

 

He stopped himself from crying, showing the robot, he wasn’t going to regret this decision.

In one shot, he downed the poison, leaving nothing in the bottle.

The crackling of the fireplace was all that was heard, as Monodam looked at the body lying on the ground, a smile adorning its motionless face.

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, first of all I am not happy with myself. Why did i make this? Why did i even post it!? Why me why! 
> 
> Moving on, i got this idea from watching today's ep of Nico's let's play of ndrv3, specifically the line where he says why does Shuichi always end up getting molested at the end of each love hotel. 
> 
> It was funny to me, then somehow my mind went into writer mode and thought of this scenario and i made myself go into a bad mood. The whole day while i was at work, i was writing _this_ and i finished it just a few hours after office hours. Not bad, but this is just me basically writing what crossed my mind. I didn't bother much with establishing things cause well one shot and all. This honestly made me so depressed that i was almost crying when i wrote the ending because Shuichi deserves all the love in the world!!! 
> 
> Hahaha, setting aside my bias for now, hope this made sense and if you felt despair as well, i apologize. i needed someone to share it with. 
> 
> oh yeah an update about my other fic, i'm still doing it, no worries, it's just i keep adding words and it turns out longer than expected and i can't post it at the moment cause if i do, most of the stuff i added wouldn't make sense so i'm trying to make it coherent or as coherent i can with my abilities. anyways that's that. 
> 
> i need to have my fill of happy Shuichi to dispel my despair. 
> 
> Bye-onara!


End file.
